Most
cultures bury their dead, but here, we lavish them with hordes of
backup dancers, expensive stylists and the best Swedish pop hits money
can buy just to prop them up on a stage and watch them entertain us. So
it goes with Britney Spears, who, despite all outward signs of being
unable to count to 11, much less headline a big-budget revue, has been
getting dragged around the country for the past two months to promote
her sixth album, "Circus."
Then
again, whoever is in charge of Spears' affairs these days has gone to
great lengths to make sure people actually pay very little attention to
Spears.
At her sold-out concert at Oakland's Oracle Arena on Wednesday, the
beleaguered 27-year-old tabloid pet was the least interesting part of
the show - a wobbly figure making very little effort to lip-sync along
to the mediocre songs from her most recent releases while all around
her acrobats, clowns, contortionists and magicians offered a dramatic
re-enactment of a real big-top spectacular.
Spears never fully recovered from the upheavals that sidelined her
career a few years ago - from stealing backup dancer Kevin Federline
from his then-pregnant wife and shedding tears on cue for Matt Lauer,
to her pantyless late-night Hollywood excursions, head shaving, the use
of one of her kids as a steering wheel, and on and on. She may have
made a decent album, but on Wednesday, it was hard not to look past the
gleaming blond extensions and meticulous dance routines to see the same
broken, bald-headed girl that just two years ago was smashing car
windows with an umbrella.
Part of the reason people shelled out the big bucks for the concert
probably had to do with wanting something to go wrong, like in
Vancouver, where Spears inexplicably walked off the stage after only
three songs, or in San Jose, where the star welcomed the audience with,
"What's up, Sacramento?"
But Spears notwithstanding, the tour itself is almost flawless, with
a great sound system and dazzling video effects. The set list, however,
which leaned heavily on tracks from "Circus" and its predecessor,
"Blackout," offered just a few musical highlights, such as latter-day
hits "If U Seek Amy," "Womanizer" and "Toxic."
The only glance back at Spears' glory years was served up in a
remixed version of her first hit, "... Baby One More Time." Even that
was a extravagance, considering that during the 90-minute set, Spears
spent nearly as much time off the stage as she did on it, letting the
circus acts carry most of the show.
The capacity crowd - the female-to-male ratio was roughly 100 to 1 -
didn't seem to care, cheering wilding every time a backup dancer did a
flip or a metal shop worker made sparks fly - don't ask. They even
applauded the awkward mid-concert advertisement for a mobile phone
carrier.
So there's the upside. While Spears may have lost her children,
sanity and personal freedom - her father, Jamie Spears, was granted
legal conservatorship over her last year - she still has a thriving
career.
But as much as you want to join the masses and root her on for the
bad lip-syncing, it's hard to put aside the feeling that Spears
shouldn't be paraded around like this just to make everyone involved a
tidy profit, that maybe she would be better off at home with her two
boys, eating a bowl of cereal and watching "The Princess Diaries."