Nelson ReviewDATE: Monday, April 8, 1991
EDITION: Morning Final
SECTION: Living
PAGE: 9B
MEMO: Pop Music Review
SOURCE: By BRAD KAVA, Mercury News Staff Writer
TOO CUTE FOR WORDS: NELSON THRILLS FANS BUT
BORES GROWN-UPS
WARNING: If you're a 14-year-old girl who likes to wear tights with boots, Madonna-style halter tops and bubblegum- colored nail polish, only read the first part of this review.
Because we already know you looooved Nelson's first Bay Area show at Berkeley Community Theater Saturday night. I mean this wasn't only the bitchin'est show you've seen this year; it was BEST show you've seen in your entire life. REEALLY.
Not only were these twin sons of mellow-rock legend Rickey Nelson the cutest, best-looking, finest babes on earth, but they played songs with a positive message. Like, they said in "After the Rain," you might be going through hard times now, but it'll get better and there's always a rainbow after the rain.
They played that song and all 12 from their first album and they even previewed a new acoustic ballad written about the memory of their father that tells us not to take anyone we love for granted.
They did these amazing theatrics, like had smoke come up from the ground and bright purple and pink lights twinkling like stars. And they wore tights, open shirts and had the most beautiful platinum shoulder-length hair.
Matthew, the cuter one with the bangs, (or was that Gunnar?) kept throwing guitar picks into the audience. Each member of the band did a solo. The drummer banged the drums with his head and later the guitar player climbed up the speakers at the side of the stage.
You and a lot of your friends in the 3,400-seat high school auditorium stood on your feet the whole 100 minutes of the show, screaming during the hard rock songs and waving your hands up in the air during the ballads.
It was like the old videos you've seen of the Beatles. Some girls even cried the whole time because these guys were so gorgeous and they were twins and their message was so pure.
Gunnar kept thanking the audience for "taking time from their busy schedules" to come see the band and for buying their records and calling MTV and "making us Number One." And between songs he said not to use drugs and if you see a friend using them, "turn them onto a good piece of music and a ghetto blaster."
Those were really good messages and they weren't like that other Satanic hard rock.
The music was so loud you could feel the drumbeats.
Really, this show was the absolute best and the only type of person who would have anything bad to say about it would be some overweight, graying 35-year-old dweeb who just couldn't understand what hard rock is about.
So, Cindy, Shannon, Kelly and Kristen, why don't you just head up to your rooms, crank up the number one hit "Love and Affection" and let me talk to your parents who were raised on the Rolling Stones and your brother who likes Metallica.
Byeeee, girls.
Now at least I won't get any pastel-colored hate mail and I can tell the truth.
As someone brought up thinking of hard rock as the music of rebellion, Nelson's songs were so sickeningly sweet they made me want to wretch.
If you don't have kids and you don't watch MTV, these are Ozzie and Harriet's grandchildren who formed a band in the mid '80s at the age of 16. They sound just like you'd expect if you could imagine such nice boys playing hard rock. Kind of like the Partridge Family with power chords.
They are huge and they are going to be bigger. They promised to return to the Bay Area for another show soon.
The six musicians were talented and did what they could with such vapid and banal songs but I came out craving Sonic Youth and Social Distortion.
If you want to send your kids to a hard rock concert where no one bites the heads off bats or has backward masking messages, this is it. You can drop them off and know they'll come out safe and uncorrupted.
KEYWORDS: MUSIC SHOW REVIEW
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